Condolence Letters - Writing a Condolence Letter to an Adult Who Has Lost a Parent

Condolence letters offer comfort and support long after the death of a parent, which can take years to accept. Your condolence letter can be a source of comfort throughout those difficult years. As we grow older, we start to reconcile with the fact that our parents are likely to die before us. Our parents are living longer, which give us more time to come to terms with their death. But when faced with the reality of their death, it is very difficult to overcome emotions of grief and bewilderment. A condolence letter written sincerely can help the bereaved adult child through the difficult times ahead.

Adult Children Dealing with the Death of a Parent
Regardless of your age and experience, your parent is always your parent. Your bond with your parents is a part of your identity that never goes away. Everyone can relate to the death of a parent, biological or not, grandparent or guardian.

Each of us is a son or a daughter, who at some point will lose a parent. You can use this knowledge as a basis for your condolence letter to the bereaved adult child. If you've already lost a parent, think back to what you felt and how you reacted and imagine that's what the bereaved is feeling right now. If you haven't already lost a parent, imagine what that might be like for yourself and the bereaved. Jot down those emotions and notes to use later in your condolence letter.

Condolence Letters - Writing a Condolence Letter to an Adult Who Has Lost a Parent

A friend of mine, whose father had passed, told me how terrified he was of approaching age forty-two because his father passed away at age forty-two. When parents die, you become more aware of your own mortality. Sometimes you might feel your parents have abandoned you and you are now an orphan no matter how old you are. The sense of loss overshadows everything you do.

Understanding this will help you to write an excellent condolence letter that truly comforts and supports the grieving adult child.

Dealing with Grief
For many adult children, grieving in public is unacceptable. People frown on such behavior. Friends and well-wishers focus their attention on the surviving spouse, or the grandchildren. No one recognizes that adult children are also grieving. In addition, when there is one surviving parent, the adult child feels it is his or her duty to "take care" of their parent and stifle their own grief.

Your condolence letter should acknowledge the fact that grieving is not only acceptable, but also necessary to get past the pain of losing a parent. Your condolence letter will likely be read in private when the bereaved can allow their emotions to come out, no matter what they are, sadness, anger, fear, relief, and so on.

Death after an Extended Illness
As an adult watching your parent go through a long period of severe illness is burdensome. The strain of being financially and emotionally responsible for their care is tremendous. You also have to devote a lot of your time in caring for your parent. If you consider the positive side, you will have more than enough time to prepare yourself emotionally to say your goodbyes. On the other hand, death can bring relief mixed with anger, exhaustion and depression.

Your condolence letter to the adult child of a parent who died of an extended illness should also acknowledge the dedication and commitment it took to take care of them, and now the bereaved can take rest and look after him or herself now. They did everything they could for their parent.

Writing a Condolence Letter
The death of a parent can be devastating, a relief or any emotion in between. Knowing that there is a complex relationship between parents and children and understanding that this is a difficult time no matter what the relationship was like, will help you write a touching and effective condolence letter.

The most important thing to remember is it doesn't matter what you write. Just go ahead and write that condolence letter.

Condolence Letters - Writing a Condolence Letter to an Adult Who Has Lost a Parent
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To help you get started, look at these free condolence letter examples online. You'll find excellent samples for many different situations to use as inspiration for your own letter.

Obituaries Help is also an excellent resource for other condolence message examples and sympathy resources. If you want to include a sympathy verse or sympathy quote, you'll find many examples online for free. Obituaries Help is the best free resource for letters of sympathy and condolence.

Melanie Walters recommends ObituariesHelp.org for Condolence Letters, sample letters of sympathy and condolence, written examples of eulogies as well as help with all aspects of funeral planning. Also download free genealogy resources and read about building a family tree.

Melanie Walters created http://www.obituarieshelp.org/ to be the complete online resource for sympathy, condolence, obituaries, funeral help and genealogy. Free Sample Condolence Letters are available online to help you write your own. Also find family tree templates, newspaper obituaries listings; plan funerals and write sympathy and condolence messages using free samples and guides.

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Eulogy for a Mother: Writing a Eulogy Mom Would Like

Writing a eulogy to remember and honor your mother is one of the most difficult things you will ever have to do. It is a time of great loss, grief and mourning, and though it is an honor to be chosen to write a eulogy for your parent, it can also be quite painful.

Because of this, it is a good idea to find a quiet place to think and write - even if it's the library. Then, once you are ready, think about the things you recall most and what comes to mind about mom and put them on paper so you won't forget.

You don't need to write each thing out word for word. Make a formal or informal outline and jot down the details so you will be speaking from the heart, not reading a speech. Your outline could look something like this:

Eulogy for a Mother: Writing a Eulogy Mom Would Like

Vital statistics (Birth date, Birth City/State, College, Worked as a___, Married Dad in 19__ and had 5 of us kids. Also close to her sister Carol and brother Michael...plus anything else you feel you want to add) Was a teacher most of her life, even when she could have retired Her 50th birthday Teaching us how to cook - and we (burnt the food, made a great dinner and surprised dad, etc.) Taking us fishing - she was great at it and loved it Humorous story - Someone came home after curfew and she was standing outside in old bathrobe to embarrass us and teach us a lesson; someone broke window with baseball, etc. How much she meant & how she will be remembered

Of course, a eulogy will be unique to each family and their experiences. If there are brothers and sisters, ask them each for a remembrance and if your father is still alive, ask him as well. The idea is that in just a few points a eulogy can be a great tribute that people will be able to identify with. It has the power to cheer the individuals in attendance and help them deal with their grief.

A good eulogy does not have to be perfect. It is more important that a eulogy come from the heart with dignity, respect and love. Those qualities come across to the audience and connect them to the individual delivering the eulogy, the family and the deceased.

You can write and deliver a good eulogy about mom because moms are special in every family in different ways. If the audience is able to understand what made her so special, you will have written a eulogy mom would like.

Eulogy for a Mother: Writing a Eulogy Mom Would Like
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To Learn More About Writing a Loving and Memorable Eulogy for Your Mother and to Get Examples of Eulogies You Can Use, Visit the Eulogy Writing Guide Today at http://EulogyWritingGuide.com/.

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Rules for Writing Poetry

You've been writing poetry since that first assignment in your high school writing class. You know the rules about writing poetry, right? Are there rules? Well, if you frequent the poetry forums across the Internet as much as I do, you'd find that there are a lot of amateur poets who adamantly declare that there are no rules for writing poetry and if someone even suggests reading poetry or books on poetry, many of the amateur poets will throw up a defensive front. My opinion seems to swing fervently toward the opposition. You have to know the rules before you break them; at least that's what I always say.

I know that writing a sonnet in iambic pentameter is an art that has been buried in the tombs of the renaissance, but understanding it, along with the numerous other dying closed forms of poetry, is a powerful tool when writing that prosy contemporary piece. Being a great poet demands an intricate understanding of the way in which language works its edges into a reader's conscience. A poem is a mosaic of sounds, syncopations, and images. All of the little fragments of a poem must work together in a unified fashion to culminate in something refreshing and new.

Refreshing and new? Well, you might wonder how understanding such archaic attributes of poetry such as meter and rhyme might help a contemporary poet craft a refreshing new poem. It is all about the sound and the innovation of it. Even scientists stand on the shoulders of those before them. You don't have to manage a perfect rhyme or a measured foot in a poem to be jumping from the inspiration of Shakespeare's sonnets, but having those rhythms and rhymes teetering in and out of the wrinkles in your brain will send a very subtle vibration of sound through your very own pieces.

Rules for Writing Poetry

In summary, read, read, read, know the rules, and then break the rules. Goodness help you, please break them.

Here are some references to help you along the way:

-Books:

The Practice of Poetry: by Robin Behn

Writing Poems: by Robert Wallace and Michelle Boisseau

A Poetry Handbook: by Mary Oliver

-Websites:

http://www.poetrylessons.org

http://www.poetrymagic.co.uk

http://www.unc.edu/depts/wcweb/handouts/poetry-explication.html

http://www.poetry-portal.com/poetry.html

-And don't forget to read some contemporary poetry:

http://www.poems.com

http://www.pedestalmagazine.com/

Rules for Writing Poetry
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Devrie Paradowski is a freelance writer and poet. Her poetry has been published by several literary journals and she has written dozens of articles for various publications including "Poetry Renewal Magazine," and "Poetryscams.com." She is the author of the chapbook, "Something In the Dirt," which can be found at http://www.lulu.com/content/108560 . In 2001, Devrie founded a popular online literary community ( http://www.LiteraryEscape.com ) that has become highly respected for some of the most honest and in-depth poetic critique on the Internet. In keeping with her commitment to inspire amateur writers to hone their skills, she also founded a local writer's group called, "The Fire and Ice Writer's Group."

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Complaint Letters: How to Respond in 7 Simple Steps

Ask many small business owners what goes into providing great customer service and you have answers such as, being polite, serving promptly, keeping your promises etc. But in this hi-tech age, we tend to forget that the humble letter has just as an important role in ensuring good customer service. Yet how many times have you received a 'letter of apology' which makes you even more dissatisfied? The message it conveys, the language used - all designed to wind you up!

With some careful thought, a well-crafted letter can provide comfort to a complaining customer and enhance your reputation as a customer-focused business. In this article I am going to share some tips on how to write a great letter.

What are you writing for?

Complaint Letters: How to Respond in 7 Simple Steps

To write a great letter you have to be in the right frame of mind. Are you writing to handle a complaint, answer a query or to thank them for placing an order? Framing the letter in the right context means you will use the appropriate language and the tone will be right. Try writing a thank you letter as if you are responding to a complaint - the message is totally different.

Before putting pen to paper, think for a minute and decide what your aim or goal is.

State your purpose

Start off by summarising why you are writing. Open your letter by saying that you are responding to a query, or to resolve a problem they have had. This set out to the reader why you are contacting them and puts them in the right frame of mind to accept your message. An opening summary will grab their attention.

Include a W.I.I.F.M.

No, this is not some obscure radio station! WIIFM stands for 'What's in it for me?' To truly engage your customer and get them on your side, you have to include a benefit for them. They have to get something out of your letter so they feel satisfied. What could their WIIFM be? Their complaint may be resolved; they may get a discount voucher; a priority service the next time they use you. If the compliant is a minor one, a simple, heartfelt apology may be enough!

Study your letter carefully and make sure you have a WIIFM moment.

Don't say 'I'

Wherever possible, avoid littering your letter with I's. The reader will find it hard to link with you if they receive 'me, me, me' letters. Review your letters and wherever possible substitute 'I' with 'you'. Change the focus to the reader. Make them feel valued.

Write as you speak

I forget the number of times I have received letters, which read as if they were written in the early 1900's! Packed full of boring, stiff and outdated language - too formal. Your writing style should reflect the way you talk. After all, providing good customer service is partly down to how you interact or communicate with your client and letters play an important role.

So, review your letters and get rid of those phrases you learnt in school letter-writing lessons!

"Please do this..."

Having written a great letter, you don't want it to tail off into nothing. Have a clear action-orientated close. Make sure your reader knows what you expect him to do next - "call me so we can discuss this idea in more depth", "Fill in the attached form and pop it in the post", "send me an order" (a bit strong perhaps but certainly to the point!).
A resounding call-to-action is a great way to finish a letter and leaves the customer in no doubt what he has to do next - another element of good customer service.

Ask someone to check your letter

If you are writing a very important letter or one containing a complex message, it's wise to ask someone to proof read it. This is not just to check your spelling but also to check readability. Is the structure of the message you wish to convey clear and understandable? You'll be amazed by what someone else will pick up which you have completely missed!

So, there you have it. Some useful tips on how to write a superb letter, which will further enforce your image of providing exceptional customer service.

© Robert Warlow
Small Business Success

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Small Business Success is a resource dedicated to helping small business owners be more successful. If you are looking for a regular flow of ideas and tips then subscribe to Small Business Success a free newsletter, which provides you with quick tips, ideas and articles. Visit http://smallbusinesssuccess.biz

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The Art of Personal Letter Writing: 7 Basic Elements

When was the last time you received a personal letter that was not sent by email, but regular snail mail? What type of attitude did it put you in when you received a nice handwritten letter or note outside of the stack of bills that sometimes become daily accessory items for your mailbox? After retrieving a huge box filled with an array of high school and college items from my mother's house, I found at the very bottom, a smaller box containing letters previously written to me from some of my old friends. There must have been about fifty letters in this box before I discarded them. I couldn't resist this last opportunity to read every one of them again. After about an hour of non-stop reading, I made a cup of hot tea and sat down to continue my journey "back down memory lane." I remember rewriting most of my letters, especially if I made a spelling mistake or if my sentence structure wasn't as I intended it to be. Judging from the amount of paper I wasted on editing, you would think that I was mailing them to a major book publisher instead of a friend!

Letter writing created a manifestation of memories bridging the distance between the sender and recipient. People were as meticulous about picking out decorative stationary to write their letters on, as much as the letter itself. This connection through written communication promoted the exchange of conversation, creativity and artistic expression.

The standard format that I followed practically every time I wrote a letter to my friends, immediate family who lived out of town, old sweethearts or occasionally some of my favorite teachers, was composed of the following basic elements:

The Art of Personal Letter Writing: 7 Basic Elements

1. The Heading (Name and Address)

2. Date

3. The Greeting (Dear So and So)

4. The Body (The message you are writing to the recipient)

5. The Closing (Sincerely, Yours Truly)

6. Your Signature

7. Post Script (There is the occasional comment that was not mentioned in the Body of your letter, but made after the signature, called the P.S. or P.S.S. The P.S.S. was an additional post script).

Sometimes on the back flap of the envelope, the writer would put a smiley face or an acronym like S.W.A.K. (Sealed With A Kiss) which indicated that a love letter was enclosed.

Penmanship in elementary school was extremely important years ago. It came as a surprise to me and some of my friends who are parents that cursive writing is not taught in most schools anymore. Therefore, the meticulousness and pride taken in one's penmanship is not as evident today as it was when I was growing up. But a personalized letter or note makes you stop, sit down, read and appreciate the thoughtfulness behind the folded message. Personalized letters displayed a unique voice, taste and style. It showed that a lot of thought, even if it wasn't especially pleasant, went into the written expression.

So why not do something out of the ordinary and make someone smile today by writing a personalized letter to them instead of an electronic one. The memories will be worth the effort, especially if the person is miles away. You will get a great deal of satisfaction from simply taking a few minutes to write an endearing personal message whether on some nice stationary or not. That would be a special gift and welcomed relief for someone to receive in the mailbox amid the endless bills.

The Art of Personal Letter Writing: 7 Basic Elements
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Kym Gordon Moore has over twenty six years of writing experience throughout her corporate career, in various industries from fashion and special event coordination to marketing, public relations and sales. She produced newsletters, press releases, flyers, essays and coordinated radio interview sessions for colleagues and local clients. Many of her articles, essays and poems appeared in several magazines, newspapers and anthologies.

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